rawrrr.

bitebitebite. *insists on the impossible*

I can do cryptic blogs toooo.

Lenin

Politics begin where the masses are, not where there are thousands, but where there are millions, that is where serious politics begin.

This morning

I woke up taller. I'm not joking or using a metaphor, I actually woke up physically taller, I nearly didn't fit in my shaving mirror. Someone commented on it when I went for breakfast. how weird. But then you are supposed to be taller in the mornings and I had slept laid out flat.

Also I my dream was highly unusual. It consisted of roaming geographical shots, never cutting away or anything just moving over the land like a perfect google earth. Places I knew like Eastbourne and that, but mostly countryside rather than town. Occasionally the camera would pause and zoom in to a place a bit but not all the way and detail a little adventure/incident that had happened to me in that place, so I'd see me and my friends in miniature running and scrabbling about the land. Also a stand up comedian was doing a set in the background, you could just hear him making his jokes and the audience laughing and that. I quite enjoyed it.

ALSO in my dream before that I managed to score mushrooms, was totally convinced I'd scored mushrooms, woke up, still convinced, 5 mins later realised with a groan that I hadn't. Back to sleep - in my dream told kie about how in a dream I'd scored mushrooms from this place and then realised I actually didn't have any, so we went to try and score some again, succeeded, we were celebrating and then I woke up and realised I had no mushrooms AGAIN. Arghhhh. Liberties dreams, liberties.

Clive Barker

I dreamed I spoke in another's language,
I dreamed I lived in another's skin,
I dreamed I was my own beloved,
I dreamed I was a tiger's kin.

I dreamed that Eden lived inside me,
And when I breathed a garden came,
I dreamed I knew all of Creation,
I dreamed I knew the Creator's name.

I dreamed--and this dream was the finest--
That all I dreamed was real and true,
And we would live in joy forever,
You in me, and me in you.

I am bored of people misrepresenting the left

The left support big government! No, we don't.
Marx said he wasn't a marxist! No, he didn't.
Leftists support totalitarian regimes! No, we don't.
Leftists just want power for themselves! No, we don't.
Leftists hate america! No, we don't.
Because leftists criticise Israel, they hate Jews! No, we don't.

Pseduo-intellectuals next to me in the library spouting all of this bullshit, my lecturer spouting similar bullshit, every pundit on TV and every journalist in the papers spouting the same fucking bullshit, it's like people love fucking bullshit or something. The entirety of academia, copro-fucking-philiacs.

Wankers. Oh my god these pratts are now saying that anti-fascism legitimises the centre-right and that the problem with the middle east is that the British relinquished their empire there. And feminism is boring apparrently.

I despair. I really do. One day. One day, the cunts.

*puts on breakcore*

*thinks about killing rich people*

Lovecraft

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.

Bowie

Fill your heart with love today
Don't play the game of time
Things that happened in the past
Only happened in your Mind
Only in your Mind-Forget your Mind
And you'll be free-yea'
The writing's on the wall
Free-yea'. And you can know it all
If you choose. Just remember
Lovers never lose
'Cause they are Free of thoughts unpure
And of thoughts unkind
Gentleness clears the soul
Love cleans the mind
And makes it Free.

Happiness is happening
The dragons have been bled
Gentleness is everywhere
Fear's just in your Head
Only in your Head
Fear is in your Head
Only in your Head
So Forget your Head
And you'll be Free
The writing's on the wall
Free-yea'. And you can know it all
If you choose. Just remember
Lovers never lose
'Cause they are free of thoughts unpure
And of thoughts unkind
Gentleness clears the soul
Love cleans the mind
And make you Free!

Free-yea Yeah-yeah-yeah. Yeah-yeah-yeah

New prosey non rhymey beat poem.

Sometimes, in the morning
When the sunshine cruelly invades our cocoon
And judges objectively
The night before
And your lips are sore
And your throat is dry
And you haven't got the energy
To say goodbye

Things can seem... a bit rubbish.

And when you stand up with a head rush and look in the mirror and see what might, once, have been a human, things can seem a bit rubbish.

And you could ask yourself... is this it? A week of drudgery, then this?

A load of fragmented memories?
Some existential dread?
Sweaty face, aching limbs
New spots on my forehead.

And at that point...it might seem like things are not just temporarily rubbish, but permanently and inescapably rubbish, philosophically rubbish, as if the universe has as it's defining characteristic: rubbishness.

But the thing is.

We are not defined
By the bad times.

You're not the spots on your forehead
You're not your weary eyes
You're not your greasy hair
You're not your roll of fat
You're not your cellulite
You're not your hairy feet with those weird, fuckin', partially side-ways little toes
You're not your boils, blisters, third nipple, lazy eye,
You are not your massive, fuck-off, nose.

You're not the time you got hideously drunk and chucked up everywhere
You're not the time you got humiliated being asked for ID on the door even though you tried putting on a deep voice and everything
You're not the time you split up from a 10-day relationship and sobbed like it was the death of love
You're not the times you spurned a good girl for a bad one 'cause the bad one was fitter

You're not the time you got so paranoid you thought everyone hated you
You're not the time you shouted at your mum and felt like a twat for doing it
You're not the time you nicked money off her for drugs
You're not the time you guiltlessly fucked your girlfriend's best mate

You're not all the times you relentlessly took the piss out of the vulnerable kid until he had tears in his eyes and it got awkward but you didn't know how to stop
You're not all the times you stayed quiet because you were for some reason afraid of people
You're not the time you swam around your room in a black pool of misanthropic bitterness, and thought - nothing is going to get better.

You're not those times.

You're more like the the time... you looked in the mirror and accepted yourself.

You're more like the time... that you looked after the one who got too fucked, got 'em home safe, and never batted an eyelid at the loss of your night.

You're the time you responded to a break-up with stoicism and goodwill.

You're the time you spurned the bad girl for the good one because the good one was better.

You're the time you felt paranoid and then stopped - laughed - said out loud this is fucking ridiculous.

You're the last time you hugged your mum and told her you love her.

You're the time you laid off the drugs for a bit or at least shared them.

You're the time when the muddle in your head cleared for a moment and you loved, just loved, the person in front of you.

You're the time you sat out on the cliff edge for hours and felt infinite.

You're the time when everything was mental and up in the air and you smiled to yourself and thought of Bill Hicks saying it's an insane world but I'm proud to be a part of it.

None of us are angels
We're diamonds in the rough
But the good is far deeper
And far more real
Than all... of the bad stuff.

RE: It is human to want to leave everything

I'm not sure if the reference will be clear. But I like the image.

Robert Browning.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep
But I have promises to keep
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

So good.

Now, you don't know what you will give up

I wonder where the fuck life will throw us all in a few years. Everything changes. Every year it's all different, and three years ago just seems like a different planet.
It all goes so fast, and nobody has the faintest idea of what they're doing or why they're doing it. But there sure are good moments. Really, really good moments. And memories.

Chat between me and Ishan about revolutions and shit

ISHAN: Must be some hench fucking tax rises...

ALEX: The problem is that in order to pay for the economic crisis, the greek government (along with the rest of europe) has decided to massively slash public spending - basically, they want to put the costs onto the workers and the poor, despite the fact that we had nothing to do with causing the problem. We need to fight back in the same way when the cuts happen here.

ISHAN: Hmm. It is pretty fucked up. Would be nice to have more diplomatic ways of solving this issue though.

Diplomacy > guns

But it's easier said, than done.

ALEX: The trouble is, there is no chance whatsoever of diplomatically appealing to the state not to do this. In Britain, for example, the three major parties all agreed that they would do the same thing the Greek government is doing now in Britain; worse, in fact. Historically too these crises have happened over and over again and every time the poor are forced to pay.

I think we should take a step back and look at the whole picture - if we can see that the rich keep causing financial meltdowns and that the governments of the world unfailingly prop them back up by making the poor suffer, why on earth should we be begging them to stop as our strategy? If someone repeatedly punches you in the face with no sign of letting up, there has to come a point where you stop tolerating it. The greeks have decided to stop tolerating it... let's hope they win. :)

ISHAN: It's alright talking about revolutions and shit, but what comes after that? Will the nation truly come together as a whole to sort the problems out, or will we appoint some awesome badass to fix our problems? Or will we just end up fighting like hooligans on the streets, mindless zombies of people that are rioting for the sake of "fuck you i won't do what you tell me, hand in the air, fucking la revolucion" riots.

What does that say about our nature?

ALEX: Well, what comes after that is a better world. Just like the mass movements that destroyed slavery and won civil rights, just like the mass movements that won women's liberation, the right to vote, public education and healthcare, living wages, and everything else.

It's not really a case of the nation needing to come together as a whole - there is a clear divide in our country and in the world between the rich elites who contribute nothing to society and get everything in return and the rest of us who contribute everything and get told to work harder and for less money. It's us that need to come together and put a stop to the system that does this to us. We can run society just fine without them - in fact, we already do. Tesco doesn't run as a shop through the magic of it's CEO, it runs as a shop because the workers there make it so - but the CEO gets all the profit and all the power. That's what needs to change.

As for mindless zombies rioting for the sake of it, if you can show me where this has ever happened on anything like a large scale then maybe it would be something to worry about. As far as I can see this idea we all get sold that revolutions are just orgies of violence is a flat-out lie.

ISHAN: I should have said that better. Talking about the people who would just riot for the sake of rioting know what I mean? Cuz there are a shitload of people like that. Counter progressive shit bro.

I definitely think it's a possibility, but I think, the chaos, will be more than substantial to piss a lot of people off, and cause a lot of havoc for a lot of people (if we do something as extreme as taking over parliament).

Mass protests would be bad ass, just not violent ones, if you catch my drift?

ALEX: About the rioting for the sake of rioting point: Again, I don't think this idea of revolutions being way-layed by some faction of hooligans stands up to any scrutiny. If we look at a specific example, say the french revolution in 1792, we can see that it didn't happen like that. There was an insurrection against the king which resulted in his arrest, the confiscation of church and aristocratic property, the scrapping of the old feudal obligations, establishment of universal male suffrage, and so on. An absolutely huge step forward from what had gone on before. This was a violent movement; it had to be, because obviously they were opposed by the french army. And yet, no mystical crowd of purposeless hooligans arrived at any point to muddle the movement up. If you know of a time when it has happened like that then that would be interesting, but as far as I know it's a fairytale that any large group has ever revolted just for the sake of it.

The violence point is related - if the french revolutionaries had lay down their arms and talked about flower power they would have just been killed by the king's forces and everyone would have had to return to their old miserable standard of life. That isn't right. Obviously any violence is terrible, but pacifist movements rarely succeed.

ISHAN: I see that. Just like Italian Unification, but the people were actually oppressed, repressed, suppressed, and any other -essed you can think of right? Is something such as raised taxes enough to call for violent protest? Like sure if we meet violence towards us, we gawna blow dem mo fuckas off this planet, just personally, it seems so ridiculous for blood to be spilled for something like that.

BUT I AGREE. If we do nothing, and think world peace will just happen, we're wrong.

Aaron Spectre - fucking genius.

I genuinely find this moving and I don't care if that's weird.

The only time I have ever managed to succeed in shutting up a spambot.

[23:14] EdwinaJumper9966@hotmail.com: wassap ;)
[23:14] Alex: Not much. Life gets boring when you're 10,000 year old bi-sexual alien.
[23:15] EdwinaJumper9966@hotmail.com: hey cutie pie :)
[23:16] Alex: You see the thing is, after 10,000 years of life as a bi-sexual alien, you begin to feel a profound sense of disconnection and alienation from the universe that you previously considered meaningful.
[23:18] Alex: How's life as a spambot?